Monday, January 19, 2009

Free Advice for KFC's Marketing Department

WHITECOLLAR REDNECK
I'm a suggestible eater, and if you run a TV ad showing a big box full of fried chicken, biscuits, and boneless wings, I'm quite likely to put "Stop by KFC for a box of fried chicken, biscuits, and boneless wings" on my to-do list.

However: if you lead into your fried chicken ad with an ad for some sort of contraceptive device that repeatedly uses the phrase "vaginal ring," and if you follow your fried chicken ad with one for Gold Bond medicated powder, well, I'm just not as hungry as I used to be. So tell the folks at TNT that there are enough ads for Ford trucks and Sprint phones that they don't need to bookend your spots with things that make your target market queasy. I'm just sayin'.

I've got some thoughts for the folks at NuvaRing about the merits of building contraceptive devices out of what appear to be discarded Slinkies, but I'll save those for another time, my chicken's getting cold.

2 comments:

Phutatorius said...

That's funny, because I read in The Anarchist Cookbook how you can make TNT by adding 11 secret herbs and spices to a 3:1 mixture of Gold Bond and —

but I'm revealing too much.

Welcome, WC Redneck! Value added (possibly multiplied) already.

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